Emotional!

I am having a huge emotional breakdown over my sister getting married and moving to KANSAS (of all places). It all started Friday...

Friday, I drove the 2 1/2 hours to Cedar City to go to Maren's shower. But, it wasn't just going to the shower. A week before, her friends (who were suppose to throw the shower) called me, and couldn't do it. So, I had to plan it. Which was fine. I mean, honestly, I am a stay at home mom. What else do I have to do? But... (another but) I had 5 kids (Taylor, Michael, Adalyn, Alysa, Brylee) at the time. I was planning on leaving all of them with Brian for the weekend. Well, he had a contract in Kingman, AZ, and was driving there at 3:00 in the morning, to be home by 6:00, so he could spend at least a few hours with the family (have I mentioned how wonderful and selfless my husband is?) So... I ended driving to Cedar City by myself with 5 kids. Luckily, our kids are very well behaved and just all around good kids, so this wasn't a problem.

We left Friday morning. We got there a good time. The shower went very well - much thanks to my sister-in -law Erika who brought all the things I didn't think of (she is wonderful!!!).

The kids stayed in the hotel room my mom was staying in, for the most part. But, being kids, they got bored. They started running around in the hall, and one of the hotel guest complained. I was distracted by the shower, and didn't notice that they were running around until they told me. I really didn't get mad at the kids. I am sure they were really bored! But I did let them know that I was disappointed because I had expected better behavior from them. I made them apologize to the front desk for running around. They were so embarrassed!!! But I think it made an impression and they won't do it again. I was trying hard not to laugh during the whole "apology".

After the shower, my friend Linda stopped by to see me. It was really good to see her again!!! I, then went to my good friend, KayLyn's, to drop off a couple thing she left when visiting us in Vegas. I also wanted to let the kids run around and play with her kids for a while because they had been cooped up all day and were going to be cooped up for another couple of hours. KayLyn has always been such a good friend to me, and I miss her so much! It was good to spend and hour "catching up".

After we left, I met Taylor and Michael's mom, Holli, in St. George. They had been spending the week with us. They were going home for the week, and coming back when Austin comes on the 13th of June. I am so appreciative to Holli for being patient with my hectic schedule!!!

Then it was the drive home. It seemed to take forever!!! The desert holds a whole lot of nothing!

We got home. I was happy to be here. Then, suddenly everything hit me. I started crying. I cried all night.

I am EXTREMELY sad that Maren is moving to KANSAS!!! I like her living in Cedar City. I know if there is ever a problem, I can be there in 2 1/2 hours. But, KANSAS!!! I cried and cried. I have known that she is getting married for a couple of months. Matt is a nice guy. I want Maren to have as much happiness as Brian and I do. I know that with all the hard times that we have had in the past with Sam, that the thing that helped me through was my own little (big) family. And I think that her having Matt and a future to plan will help her move on.

But still... I have to be sad, for me, for just a minute.

I am losing not only my sister, but... my best friend. We have been there for each other through everything!!! She lived with us while we were in Enoch, UT. My girls love her, almost as much as they love me. She was there to visit them all in the hospital, shortly after they were born. She has cried to me, and I have cried to her. We have laughed and celebrated good times together.

What am I suppose to do without her?

I hope that Matt really likes me, because I will be visiting in Kansas! I have already looked up flights and found that they are not to expensive.

In Vegas, I have always felt comfort knowing that if Maren ever needed anything, she was only a 2 1/2 car drive away. Now I feel comforted knowing that she will only be a 2 1/2 hour flight away and a $200 round trip plane ticket away (although Brian says $400 because if Matt every does anything to upset her, he will fly out with me to kick his butt!).

I am trying to get all my emotions out now, so that I can have nothing but happiness for Maren and Matt on their wedding day. I love her so much!!! I am really excited that Matt is going to be the newest member of our big, crazy family! And I know, that no matter what... or where she lives, that Maren and I will be not only sisters, but best friends!!!